These are tag lines that could easily describe the last year (not to mention preceeding years) of my life. I am not the type of person that realizes all I have been through in such a short period of time, until I force myself to slow down and intentionally reflect. I find the day to day of life to be busy and exciting. Weeks can go by before I realize I've just been through some major life event, let alone how deeply I've been impacted by it.
Moving, different jobs, no job, adding a child, marriage, poverty, you name it, it is probably something I have sped through in the last couple of years without giving myself the proper time to respect the MASSIVE personal changes that result from those kinds of things. But here I am. And right now, I'm thinking about last year, specifically, and reflecting on the big things that came about.
Zion's First Birthday
Successful EMDR Treatment
Joined New Church Community
Moved, Again (Third time in 3 years!)
Maid of Honor in my BFF's Wedding
Third Wedding Anniversary
Gave Up Alcohol, Again
Celebrated My 30th Birthday
Moved Blog from Tumblr to Blogger
I know this list is incomplete, but just seeing the few things on the list, 2011 was definitely a very busy year for me. Some of these events brought great joy, and most took a lot of energy and planning and were down-right exhausting! Few of these events received their proper weight of reflection and introspection.
But 2012 is going to be a different year…
intentional living, moment by moment.
This year I am going to slow things down or at least make an attempt at it.
I'm going to say "no" more and "yes" less.
I am going to be more real with myself, and unafraid of what people think.
I'm going to be a courageous storyteller, a devoted and respectful wife, and an approachable mother.
I am going to weigh decisions, and options more heavily.
I am going to learn how to relax and let things be less about time efficiency and more about quality.
I am not going to make any more excuses for where I am,
instead I am going to work hard to get to where I want to be.
Perhaps it was the pivotal moment of crossing that threshold from my 20's to 30's that has motivated me to make life count, or maybe it was my transition to motherhood and seeing how quickly my daughter has grown? It very well may be God just asking me to slow down and not miss the "living" part of life. Whatever the reason, this year I'm doing just that.
Time and tide wait for no man, but time always stands still for a woman of thirty.