But you, O God, do see trouble and grief; you consider it to take it in hand. The victim commits himself to you; you are the helper of the fatherless. Break the arm of the wicked and evil man; call him to account for his wickedness that would not be found out. The LORD is King for ever and ever; the nations will perish from his land. You hear, O LORD, the desire of the afflicted; you encourage them, and you listen to their cry, defending the fatherless and the oppressed, in order that man, who is of the earth, may terrify no more. Psalms 10:14-18I've been angry, heart-broken and sickened lately by the injustices committed against children in our world. Yes, I'm angry at the LRA/Kony crimes that have recently headlined social media and the news. But there are so many more examples of children being used and abused, some a little too close to my heart.
I'm burdened. Thinking about the mistreatment of children not only angers me, with what I can only describe as a righteous fury, it brings me to a place in my past that I don't want to talk about or remember. But here I am, faced with the ache in my heart for the lives and well being of the millions of children suffering at the hands of others in our world. Here I am remembering what it feels like to have no where to turn, no safe place.
Let me be clear that: in no way do I pretend to know what it is like to be abducted from my family and forced into submission as a child soldier. And in no way do I pretend to be able to fathom what being forced into sex-trafficking is like. That, thank God, is not my story. I do know what neglect feels like, I know what abuse feels like, and I know what being used as a weapon of retaliation looks like too.
I've touched on the brokenness of my family before on this blog, and feeling unwanted as a child. I have yet to talk about the custody battles and family court, and being a "ward" of the state as a result of my biological parents selfishness and bitter hatred for one another. I have yet to talk about the seeds of poison planted in my heart by the continuous barrage of manipulative messages bent on warping my heart towards one parent or another.
The last week has been especially trying on my heart, as I've been praying for two little girls who are experiencing this same kind of trauma and fear. They fear not being taken care of, they fear threatened physical violence, and they fear total abandonment. They feel they have no safe place.
Through becoming a mother, God has put a deep longing in my heart to be a safe place for these children. I don't know exactly what this looks like, and I don't have all of the answers, but I trust God to reveal his plan day by day. I want to protect these little girls, I want to rescue others like them. I want them to know how much they matter to God, how much they are loved, even those I have yet to know, I have loved.
You are my hiding place; You shall preserve me from trouble; You shall surround me with songs of deliverance. Psalm 32:7